Wednesday, February 13, 2013

in which there is bread in my belly

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I love this sweater.  I can't believe my friend Elizabeth gave it away, but I'm glad she gave it to me! :)  I also can't believe I wanted to cut it up and turn it into a vest at one point.  That would have been a travesty!

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(sweater: llbean; scarf/shirt: thrifted; jeans: pacsun; boots: tjmaxx; earmuffs: urban outfitters)

I'm having sort of a mind-body WTF situation going on right now.  On one hand, I feel good.  I've been getting up at 7 AM this week, which is EARLY for me.  This gives me just enough time to have a cup of coffee, eat breakfast, write my morning pages, and read a few chapters of a book.  I've also been exercising.  I went to the gym on Monday night, I did my workout video last night, and I'll be going to the gym again tonight.  On the other hand, I've been eating a lot of bread.  Now, don't get me wrong, I LOVE BREAD.  As a relatively lazy, carb-craving vegetarian, I eat a lot of it--pasta, hunks of sourdough, bagels, sandwiches--but lately whenever I eat bread I feel kind of uggggghhhh.  It's almost like all of the good things I'm doing lately (working out, avoiding alcohol) are just making the knot of bread in my stomach that much more unpleasant.

The thing is, I've been thinking a lot about what I eat lately, and it's not just because I watched that documentary or because I can't just slip into my skinny jeans like I used to or because I want to appear virtuous or anything like that.  It's because a lot of the "comfort" foods that have always been staples of my diet now make me feel ugggggghhh.  And I don't like that feeling.  I don't know if it's just because I'm getting older and my metabolism is dragging, or just because it's winter and I don't get enough fresh air and everything feels like uggggghhh (a distinct possibility), or because I really should just embrace being healthy,  once and for all.  I've always loved my bread and wine and cheese, and I have never wanted to deny myself the pleasure of those things for this or that reason.  I've always clung to them with a sort of "I will indulge!  It is my right! You can't take that away!" mentality, but what if avoiding those things could make my life more pleasant?  I dunno, it's on my mind.


  1. amen sister.

    my dad made cheesy corn casserole when i was home and i stupidly ate a second serving KNOWING my stomach cannot handle cheese like it used to. but it was soo good. and it took me two very uncomfortable days to get it out of my system.

    lesson learned: no more cheesy casseroles no matter how tasty they look. I cannot handle that much dairy/preserves/whatever else is in them.

    but really i already knew that, so really I still need to learn - trust my new diet choices and don't revert back to old habits when not at home. (i still blame the boy - not getting older)

  2. I love the sweater, it looks so warm and cozy! Love the print mix with the tartan scarf and the plaid shirt peeking out! And these earwarmers, aw so adorable :)

    Hm I'm sorry to hear you can't enjoy certain foods anymore. I had the same problem when I was on my Weight Watchers diet, the more I changed my eating habits and consumed "lighter" food, the more I had problems with carb-heavy meals.
    I think you have to find a new balance for your body then, that is not avoiding bread completely, but eating less and making up for it by eating, I don't know, more cheese or so?!
    Dunno, you just have to try different food combinations to find out what feels better for your tummy ;)

  3. I think its something to do with winter, because I am sitting here in a food coma from salad. Granted it wasn't leafy greens with lemon juice, but it wasn't a burger of a salad either. That sweater, to me is quintessential New England, love it.

    new follower :)

  4. Super-kicky outfit
    No comment on the 'what if giving up delicious foods will make me feel better' track, because that is TOO SCARY.

  5. I've been feeling the same way. I think a LOT of it has to do with the weather/winter. I've been avoiding dairy (and alcohol - so hard!) and trying to eat plant based meals during the week and then allowing myself to indulge a little on the weekend. Not because I want to lose weight or anything, but because it genuinely makes me feel better about myself. And I feel like these are great habits to start in your 20's to carry on through adulthood. I only wish I had more time to actually work out! Good luck on your quest...

  6. Hi! I actually had been experiencing the same type of carb uncomfortableness lately, and during the past two months have experimented with on-and-off gluten-free eating. I noticed that when I was eating gluten-free I felt amazing and with so much energy but whenever I resorted back to regular eating habits, I started to feel crappy again. After all of my trial and error, I have chalked it up to a gluten intolerance (possible allergy?) so I am avoiding gluten from now on and ACTUALLY have found that it is not as hard as I thought! There are a lot of gluten-free bread and pasta options out there now, and recipes you can try with different types of grain that isn't wheat. So you can still make your comfort meals without the heaviness and stomach ache.

    Just a suggestion, but maybe try it for a week or two and see if it helps! If you live anywhere near a Trader Joe's or Whole Foods, they have good gluten-free sections. Worth a try maybe? :)